This is the guy who...

• This is the guy who sends missiles and A-bombs my way, sometimes using combat planes.
• This is the guy who plants exploding soccer balls where I am. Keep the exploding Jabulani to yourself, loser!
• This is the guy who gets gang members to shoot at the house I'm in.
• This is the guy who sends serial killers to chase me, and makes sure there's a lot of blood, especially if I attack said killer.
• This is the guy who sinks the ship I'm in, or crashes the airplane where a friend is flying.
• This is the guy who causes earthquakes, tsunamis, tornadoes, hurricanes, and fires right where I am.
• This is the guy who puts me right inside the horror movie I'm watching.
• This is the guy who hides B. from me so I don't see him at all, or gets him to ignore or reject me.
• This is the guy who pits my crushes against me so they are rude to me.
• This is the guy who makes bad things happen to my cats or to the people I love.
• This is the guy who allows me to enter enemy territory and makes sure I get caught and imprisoned.
• This is the guy who makes asteroids detour to crash on the area I'm in.
• This is the guy who closes ALL possible exits in the building I need to escape out of.
• This is the guy who makes me run way too slow when in a dire situation.
• This is the guy who gets people to inject nasty drugs in me, against my will.
• This is the guy who makes nasty, cheap-looking but destructive and scary storms without even using Kracko.
• This is the guy who pits the mother and brother I got on earth against me, bringing out the absolute worst in them.

And...

• This is the guy who makes sure I get so sleepy I either can't wake up or go back to the bad dream.

I try to keep him at bay by sprinkling a few drops of Lavender Essential Oil on my pillow, but this is the weapon that can defeat him: 






Just swing it towards him to shoot deadly stars. If it ever runs out, use it to beat the shit out of him.